hulla hoop. ;p. it has been over a few weeks since the last time i update this bloggie of mine. haha. ;p. sorry. i was away for awhile. wee. loads of stuff happens ok. good stuff and several bad stuff, i mean, the 'not so good' stuff. ;).
i balik kampung ok. suddenly. my mum woke me up that morning, and was like 'hurry up, pack your things, flight pkul speuluh nnt'. so, i kelam kabut la kan. haha. sumbat smua dlm bag, and off we go. ok, ktorg naik that firefly plane. haha. it was small. pretty cmfrtble la jugak. but hey, i am so so so friggin afraid of heights, so, it was a scary ride. haha. ;p. wtv. smpi je kt trggnu airport, my grndpa, abg syfq and aiman was waiting in the car. so, off we go. smp je rmh my grndma, i was like 'wow, this place havent changed at all, still old and comfy'. ;). it was GREAT! ok? hehe. i got out of the car, and i saw adam danish. hehe. cik ngoh was holding him. he was SO CUTE! yes yes he sure is ok. u better believe me. hehe. ;). dkt rumah my grndprnts, ada cik ngoh, syahmi, abg syfq, adib, aqir, wan, ki, aiman darwish and adam danish. hehe. cool cool. it was fun to have them around. ngee. mlm tu, cik long, ayh long and kak da dtg rmh wan. well, at frst, its kinda weird la when i am around kak da, sbb dh lma xjmpe. but hey, it turns out to be ok. siyesly ok. ;). the next day, ong and his wife [gosh, i cnt rmmbr my aunt's nme] and his three lil kids dtg, tehy arrived subuh tu. huhu. so, kitorg pakat2 nk turun bandar. miahaha. so here we go, i pegi la sbb i nk pegi rmh cik long. ada plan sikit dgn kak da. haha. ;p. mama, mcm biasa la, trun sbb nk pg psr kdai payang, nk bli kain and stuff. msa dgn kak da tuh, i pegi kat food carnival, it was HUGE. really. mcm mcm mknan ada. but msa kitorg pegi uh, xbnyk stall yg buka. so, yeahh. than, kak da ajk pegi butik ape tah, die nk cri hndbag, so kitorg pegi la. then, xjmep yg bknan di hati. so kitorg pegi blik dkt food crnival, kak da mkn laksa ape tah. i tggu je. not in the mood to eat la katakan. miaha. ;p. lps mkn, kak da ckp nk pegi gntg rmbt plak. so, pegi la balik kt tmpt sbelah kdai butik uh. kitorg tggu nearly two hours ok. sbb there is this customer, tngah buat teknik rebonding. cehh. gile lama. ada bnyk lagi bnda yg jd for that past few days, but hey, mls la nk type. haha. grr. i was in trggnu for a few days. it was FUN. my grndprnts pun sht je. alhamdulillah. :)).
on thursday morning, i pegi kl. naik bus. woot woot. smp kt kl dlm pkul enam lbih. taht bus slow mcm ape je. pehh. bosan. :(. but hey, bus tuh cantik and comfy gile. haha. ;p. ok, so we arrived dkt putra, then, driver dh tggu, so, off we go to kampung baru. cik ngoh n fmly still in trggnu, but cik ngoh ask us to stay there, so, kitorg pun tggl dkt rmh cngoh for a few days. :). abg sharir je yg ada bcs die kerja kan, so xdpt balik kampung. woot woot. mma busy dgn acara mnembak die mlm uh. so, pity her lah kan. smp smp je, rushing nk pg pulapol utk training. huhu. so, mlm uh, i msg la labu kan. i ckp la yg i dh smp kl. mlm uh die bgtahu yg die tngah skt leher. kesian dia. sigh. the next morning, mma ksi kitorg kluar. so, pg uh, aftr mma dh pegi, i call nik, i ckp nk jmpe die. i msg labu, i ckp nk jmpe die. labu was like 'pukul brpa?', and i ckp la dlm tngah hr nnt ke. nik pegi dgn labu. so, kitorg dkt klcc la. mna lagi kan. hehe. diorg arrived dlm pkul dua cmtuh. i was eating dkt dunkin donuts dgn my lil sis. then, my sis was like 'kakak, diorg ade kt luar', i ddnt blive her and keep on eating, sbb dh bnyk kali she punk'd me. so, i am nt wasting my time. haha. at lst, i saw three pple msuk dlm dnkin donuts uh, tgk tgk diorg. and tehy were acting like tehy dont know me. haha. i malu gilee. sbb dh lma xjmpe diorg kan. hehe. nik dtg kt i. we were hugging and blablabla. i saw my labu. hehe. die kacak. TOLD YA! hehe. overall, it was FUN. :). wlpn dpt hngout skejap je. :).
well, school dh nk buka. sigh. esk dh nk skolah. sngt mls la weyh. :(. i am busy balik. ggaaahhh. :(. takpe, this year je. nie pun, mma xde ok. die dgn abh trbg pegi bangkok pg td. sbuh sbuh td. :(. 15th nnt bru balik. OH NO!! :((.
well, till here. skt jari ah. haha. btw, i miss labu. die pegi kem. wheuw. well, die pun xslalu msg i kan. pehh. xpe xpe. i undrstnd. he is so BUSY. :). nvmind. ok la, toodles.
Sunday
Monday
28th May 2007.
oh ok. today is monday. and i woke up early, i guess. about sven smthng. reply bu pnye msg. ehm. i asked him ok psl semua tuh. it ddnt turned out good anyway. uhmm. idk. die ckp i ragu ragu dgn dia. well yeah, i mmg mcm ragu ragu sket dgn dia. yela, tgk die cm xheppi mna pun. uhmmph. :((. ok, stop kejap psl tuh. abt mum, die dmam pula hr nie. ksian tgk dia. smlm die balik, smp umh dlm pkul stu lebih. i sdr, sbb die msuk my room and kiss ketot and me. abh pun balik sma. wheuw. leeegaaa. but hey, mmg ksian la tgk mma. die dmm, batuk, slsma. wush wush. tp, gatal je nk mkn eskem. mama mama. ehehe. ;p. well, abh tade kt rmh hr nie, tgh hr td die pegi kedah. goshh. ssh gila nk lkt kt rmh taw my dad nieyh. ehm. riiinndduu my family. rndu nk mkn ramai2 mcm dlu. ddk stu meja, ckp ckp, mkn mkn, gurau gurau. gosshyyy.
oh well ok, td i ym jap dgn bu. tp, sddnly die sgnout wtht telling me. seedddihh ok? uhm. pastuh bg msg xdrply plak uh. msscll pun xdbls. ehmm. busy kot. yeah yeah. well, hr nie i just bace sjarah je tdi. gila bosan. pastuh tgk tv je. den, main ketot kentot tu pnye nintendo ds. pehh. dh lma xusik mnde tuh. haha. pening pala pening pala. huhu. well well, td bfore abh pg kdah, die tnye me dgn aqff, nk balik trggnu x. then i ckp ah, i got tutions, mcm mna nk blik an, aqff plak free, so abh ingt nk send aqff dgn qilla ke trggnu naik flght. well yyeaaahh. i xbleh lps ttion sbb, nie chpter trigo ok, susah sngt. cannot go. wheuw. so, abh ckp ah, nnt kyong abh bwk ah pegi kl dgn mama. haha. pdn muka diorg. hehe. tp, pehh, i dnt thnk i dpt pegi, still ada ttion hr sbtu nnt. winkies.
oh ye, ptg td, i chat dgn ain. ngaha. dat woman of mine, suka buat i ceria balik. although kitorg knal through myspce je. ngee. she is so friggin sweet la. and juge very undrstnding. wwhheeeuuww. ;). she is in pnang rght now, dkt glngls, ayh die msuk icu. pity her. sigh.
well then, till here je la. i jst hve to go. nk out out dr onlining nieyh. byebye.
oh well ok, td i ym jap dgn bu. tp, sddnly die sgnout wtht telling me. seedddihh ok? uhm. pastuh bg msg xdrply plak uh. msscll pun xdbls. ehmm. busy kot. yeah yeah. well, hr nie i just bace sjarah je tdi. gila bosan. pastuh tgk tv je. den, main ketot kentot tu pnye nintendo ds. pehh. dh lma xusik mnde tuh. haha. pening pala pening pala. huhu. well well, td bfore abh pg kdah, die tnye me dgn aqff, nk balik trggnu x. then i ckp ah, i got tutions, mcm mna nk blik an, aqff plak free, so abh ingt nk send aqff dgn qilla ke trggnu naik flght. well yyeaaahh. i xbleh lps ttion sbb, nie chpter trigo ok, susah sngt. cannot go. wheuw. so, abh ckp ah, nnt kyong abh bwk ah pegi kl dgn mama. haha. pdn muka diorg. hehe. tp, pehh, i dnt thnk i dpt pegi, still ada ttion hr sbtu nnt. winkies.
oh ye, ptg td, i chat dgn ain. ngaha. dat woman of mine, suka buat i ceria balik. although kitorg knal through myspce je. ngee. she is so friggin sweet la. and juge very undrstnding. wwhheeeuuww. ;). she is in pnang rght now, dkt glngls, ayh die msuk icu. pity her. sigh.
well then, till here je la. i jst hve to go. nk out out dr onlining nieyh. byebye.
Sunday
27th Of May 2007.
i woke up at six this morning. then i tidur balik. after awhile i woke up again at eight, i look at my phone incase there is any msgs frm faiz, but gss what? no sign of him at all. so, i gave him a goodmorning msg. then, i tidur balik. i woke up back at about nine something. took my bath. do a lil laundry. clean up the house and stuff. the kitchen was left in a mess ok? terkejut gila pagi td. ape la yg abg wan buat smp bsepah2 dapur. grr. ;(. nvmind abt that, i do some revision. skejap je, lazy la wehh. urggh. than i online skejap, pastuh offline balik. main games skjp. pastuh, tgk tv. read storybooks. borrrinngg gila. hmmph.
in teh afternoon, i online balik, play some interactive games online, than, logout. i just mkn roti je hr nie. drank loads of water. perut pun dh bloated. haha. wtv. masuk bilik, than nmpk ada tga msg. one from faiz, one from ain, one from bro ayzel. i replied all three, simpan balik phne, then i ddk dpn tv, watch dvd, crita the devils wears prada forthe third time. haha. best gila. suke tgk anne hathaway. cun. ;). pehh.
evrythng is ok ok je hr nie. mmg mmbosankan ok. siyesly. idk what to do at all. gilaa laaa. urghh. all i do is just sit around and bore myslf. the worse holiday of my entire life!! sheesh. me with this muka pucat and not feeling so well. shit shit shit. hmmphh. badly missing that big guy of mine. he doesnt seem to care much abt me anyway. sighh. i am starting to think that this is all a big mistake. him accepting me in his life and so on. if i tahu die xheppi mcm nie, i wont even tell my feelings and stuff. i had rather shut up. as long as he is happy. tgk la skg nie mcm mna. hmm. still sma, die dgn life die, me dgn my lfe. omg omg omg. what should i do? i loved him. i really do. sighh. die ada org lain ke eh? ehmm. but u trusted him, with all my heart. i hope he doesnt betray my trust. sheesh. hmm.
well, my parents are still not home tday. pishposh. i missed them so much much much. abg niza ckp mma balik mlm nie, but hey, xde pun. :((. i missed her. i am so friggin lonely rght now. goshie goshie. uhmpph. if all my fmly mmbrs are wth me, i wont be feeling this way. i wont be lonely. but rght now, i just hve nobody. nobody to talk to, nobody to share stories with, nobody to hangout wth. as for my sblings, asek bgaduh je. i cannot tahan all this nonsense gaduh thingy. masing2 nk mnang je. xpnh nk mngalah. aqiff tu pun stu. yg chia tuh, mlut mngalahkan org tua. pakai lepas je ckp. xpnh nk fkir. urgh.
TENSION OK??? urghh. nobody seems to understand my situation. hmm.
wtv. byebye.
in teh afternoon, i online balik, play some interactive games online, than, logout. i just mkn roti je hr nie. drank loads of water. perut pun dh bloated. haha. wtv. masuk bilik, than nmpk ada tga msg. one from faiz, one from ain, one from bro ayzel. i replied all three, simpan balik phne, then i ddk dpn tv, watch dvd, crita the devils wears prada forthe third time. haha. best gila. suke tgk anne hathaway. cun. ;). pehh.
evrythng is ok ok je hr nie. mmg mmbosankan ok. siyesly. idk what to do at all. gilaa laaa. urghh. all i do is just sit around and bore myslf. the worse holiday of my entire life!! sheesh. me with this muka pucat and not feeling so well. shit shit shit. hmmphh. badly missing that big guy of mine. he doesnt seem to care much abt me anyway. sighh. i am starting to think that this is all a big mistake. him accepting me in his life and so on. if i tahu die xheppi mcm nie, i wont even tell my feelings and stuff. i had rather shut up. as long as he is happy. tgk la skg nie mcm mna. hmm. still sma, die dgn life die, me dgn my lfe. omg omg omg. what should i do? i loved him. i really do. sighh. die ada org lain ke eh? ehmm. but u trusted him, with all my heart. i hope he doesnt betray my trust. sheesh. hmm.
well, my parents are still not home tday. pishposh. i missed them so much much much. abg niza ckp mma balik mlm nie, but hey, xde pun. :((. i missed her. i am so friggin lonely rght now. goshie goshie. uhmpph. if all my fmly mmbrs are wth me, i wont be feeling this way. i wont be lonely. but rght now, i just hve nobody. nobody to talk to, nobody to share stories with, nobody to hangout wth. as for my sblings, asek bgaduh je. i cannot tahan all this nonsense gaduh thingy. masing2 nk mnang je. xpnh nk mngalah. aqiff tu pun stu. yg chia tuh, mlut mngalahkan org tua. pakai lepas je ckp. xpnh nk fkir. urgh.
TENSION OK??? urghh. nobody seems to understand my situation. hmm.
wtv. byebye.
A Beautiful Movie Indeed! ;).
Landon: I'll take you home. You'll be be.
Jamie: No. Landon! I'm sick. I have Leukemia.
Landon: No. You're 18. You - you're perfect.
Jamie: No. I found out two years ago and I've stopped responding to treatments.
Landon: So why didn't you tell me?
Jamie: The doctor said I should go on and live life normally as best I could. I - I didn't want anybody to be weird around me.
Landon: Including me?
Jamie: Especially you! Ya know, I was getting along with everything fine. I accepted it, and then you happened! I do not need a reason to be angry with God
True Stuff Ogeyh.
This text punya bahasa is kinda berbunga bunga jugak ah bahasa die. But, if u rlly undrstnd the meaning and try to read btween the lines, this text makes sense. ;). SERIOUSLY. ;).
Jika kamu memancing ikan.
Bila ikan tu dah terlekat kat mata kail, hendaklah kamu mengambil terus ikan itu.
Janganlah sesekali kamu lepaskan ia semula ke dalam air begitu sahaja.
Kerana ia akan sakit oleh kerana bisanya ketajaman mata kailmu dan mungkin ia akan menderita selagi ia masih hidup.
Begitulah juga setelah kamu memberi banyak pengharapan kepada seseorang.
Setelah dia mula menyayangimu hendaklah kamu menjaga hatinya.
Janganlah sesekali kamu terus meninggalkannya begitu sahaja.
Kerana dia akan terluka oleh kenangan bersamamu dan mungkin tidak dapat melupakan segalanya selagi dia mengingatimu.
Jika kamu menadah air biarlah berpada, jangan terlalu mengharap pada takungannya dan janganlah menganggap ia begitu teguh.
Cukuplah sekadar keperluanmu.
Apabila bekas takungan itu retak,tentu sukar untuk kamu menampalnya semula.
Akhirnya ia dibuang.
Sedangkan jika kamu cuba membaikinya mungkin ia masih boleh digunakan lagi.
Begitu juga jika kamu memiliki seseorang terima lah seadanya.
Janganlah kamu terlalu mengaguminya dan janganlah kamu menganggapnya begitu istimewa.
Anggaplah dia manusia biasa.
Apabila sekali dia melakukan kesilapan bukan mudah bagi kamu untuk menerimanya. Akhirnya kamu kecewa meninggalkannya.
Sedangkan jika kamu memaafkannya boleh jadi hubungan kamu akan berterusan hingga ke akhirnya.
Jika kamu telah memiliki sepinggan nasi yang kamu pasti baik untuk dirimu. Mengenyangkan, berkhasiat.
Mengapa kamu berlengah, cuba mencari makanan yang lain.
Terlalu ingin mengejar kelazatan.
Kelak, nasi itu akan basi dan kamu tidak boleh memakannya.
Kamu akan menyesal.
Begitu juga jika kamu telah bertemu dengan seorang insan yang kamu pasti membawa kebaikan kepada dirimu.
Menyayangimu, mengasihimu.
Mengapa kamu berlengah, cuba membandingkannya dengan yang lain.
Terlalu mengejar kesempurnaan.
Kelak, kamu akan kehilangannya apabila dia menjadi milik orang lain.
Kamu juga yang akan menyesal.
Jika kamu memancing ikan.
Bila ikan tu dah terlekat kat mata kail, hendaklah kamu mengambil terus ikan itu.
Janganlah sesekali kamu lepaskan ia semula ke dalam air begitu sahaja.
Kerana ia akan sakit oleh kerana bisanya ketajaman mata kailmu dan mungkin ia akan menderita selagi ia masih hidup.
Begitulah juga setelah kamu memberi banyak pengharapan kepada seseorang.
Setelah dia mula menyayangimu hendaklah kamu menjaga hatinya.
Janganlah sesekali kamu terus meninggalkannya begitu sahaja.
Kerana dia akan terluka oleh kenangan bersamamu dan mungkin tidak dapat melupakan segalanya selagi dia mengingatimu.
Jika kamu menadah air biarlah berpada, jangan terlalu mengharap pada takungannya dan janganlah menganggap ia begitu teguh.
Cukuplah sekadar keperluanmu.
Apabila bekas takungan itu retak,tentu sukar untuk kamu menampalnya semula.
Akhirnya ia dibuang.
Sedangkan jika kamu cuba membaikinya mungkin ia masih boleh digunakan lagi.
Begitu juga jika kamu memiliki seseorang terima lah seadanya.
Janganlah kamu terlalu mengaguminya dan janganlah kamu menganggapnya begitu istimewa.
Anggaplah dia manusia biasa.
Apabila sekali dia melakukan kesilapan bukan mudah bagi kamu untuk menerimanya. Akhirnya kamu kecewa meninggalkannya.
Sedangkan jika kamu memaafkannya boleh jadi hubungan kamu akan berterusan hingga ke akhirnya.
Jika kamu telah memiliki sepinggan nasi yang kamu pasti baik untuk dirimu. Mengenyangkan, berkhasiat.
Mengapa kamu berlengah, cuba mencari makanan yang lain.
Terlalu ingin mengejar kelazatan.
Kelak, nasi itu akan basi dan kamu tidak boleh memakannya.
Kamu akan menyesal.
Begitu juga jika kamu telah bertemu dengan seorang insan yang kamu pasti membawa kebaikan kepada dirimu.
Menyayangimu, mengasihimu.
Mengapa kamu berlengah, cuba membandingkannya dengan yang lain.
Terlalu mengejar kesempurnaan.
Kelak, kamu akan kehilangannya apabila dia menjadi milik orang lain.
Kamu juga yang akan menyesal.
Saturday
26th Of May 2007.
today is saturday! :). well, it has been a long time eversince i last post my blog dkt bloggie nie. well, as i say, been a bit busy lately. no time for bloggie woggie. hehe. ;p. i hve got loads of stuff to share with. winkwink. lets talk abt the past few days.
24nd may.
u knw what? on this date, at abt eleven smthng, i am his girl again. i am so friggin happy. hehe. well, dua tga hr sblm tuh, i often msg him. than one day bfore this date, i told him evrythng. terus terang la lebih kurang. about every sngle thing. and i told him that i want him back. die suruh i ngorat die balik. so yeah, on this date, i ngorat la die balik. i called him, we talked, dia ttp dgn die punye jokes. hehe. xde pun nk serious taw. lol. he asked me to sing if i xnk ngorat die. baru die trime me. hehe. so, aftr a few while, i did sang a song. nk tahu lagu apa? lagu skolah. miahahhaa. ;p. tehn phne trputus sbb die pnye bttry phne low. so, yeah, i ingt it wont happen that night. but sddnly, he sent me a msg using payit pnye phne, saying that die dh lma trime me, tp sje nk dgr me nyanyi. hehe. mamat tuh. mmg nk kna cubit bnyk bnyk nnt. ngahaha. ;p. its a great day lah juge. :). i am so friggin happy. as for him, i xthu la. ehmm. :(.
25th May.
on this date pula, i fnished my mdyr exm pper. yay! est, boleh tahan la soalan die. hehe. kewlness. i lliikkee. miahaha. ;p. well, abt him, he told me earlier yg die nk pg cmp on this date aftr frday pryer. so, i mati mati la pcye kan. but u knw what? at last, mlm tuh, i sje je on ym, nk apprve syafira pnye rquest as my frnd, tibetibe nmpk die tngah online. i was like so broken hearted time uh. i asked him, 'ckp pg kem ptg td, nie boleh je online', u knw what he replied? 'xjd lor, pegi esk, pkul 6'. than i ws like, 'ok', die just reply 'huhu' je. ehmm. die mcm xheppi je dgn me ok. and die buat i rse mcm i yg pkse die accpt me balik. idk. if i knew yg dia xkn hppy, i wont asked him to accpt me back in his life. siyes, die mmg nmpk cm xheppi je. pura pura heppi. i asked him, die trme me sbb smpati ke, die ckp x, die trme sbb die luv me. ok ok, i trust him. ehm. i asked him, boleh x i cll him bubu, and he was like, ok je. i am a lil bit frustrated rght now. i wnt to knw his real flngs. me tkt, tkt die pula yg tggl me nnt. hmm. what to do nieh. aduhai. he ddnt even call me b ok? he just called me nisa. it seems like, he prefers it that way. i just accpt it wtht saying anythng. yela kan, mst ht die mcm dh twr je. but i am trying hard to mke him cmfrtble again with me. bile dlm phne, die ok taw. tp, kalau ym and msg, die cm lain sikit. i dnt knw why why why why why. runsing la. ehmm. die buat me rse yg die buat ni sume sbb me yg nk, bkn die yg nk. me xnk la mcm tuh. me nk die trme me sbb he loves me and need me. sigh. i am pretty sad. even when i do hve him, i still drop my tears for him evry sngle tme i think abt him. sighh. he means a lot to me. i wnt to mke him happy. i nk jmpe die, so that i cn sit infrnt of him, and stare at his eyes, to know smada die love me or tdk. ehmm. i wnt him to trust me that i wont break his heart agan for the 4th time, i dh hlg die tga kali ok. i dnt wnt to loose him again. he is my everything. i xnk org lain. siyesly i xnk. ehm. within this few months of breakup thingy, it ddnt turned up well. i do miss him. i do love him, infact, makin bnyk. mkn btmbh2. ehm ehm ehm. i wonder what he feels for me. i takut hilang die. die rmai pminat. :((.
as for tday kan, i woke up early, at abt six smthng, msg him gdmrning. then tdo balik. hr nie sngt bosan. xthu la knpe. ehm. pegi tusen je td. dkt rmh td pun, stdy bio je sket. tgk tv. dgr music. main psp. tu je ah. hhaihh. bosan. wondering ape la yg bu buat skrg nie. mst sdg bgmbira. bestnyee. oh lupe pula, smlm bro ayzel msg me, he asked me knpe dlte myspce. and then die tny, mcm mna me dgn ace, or dh dpt ank mami baru. pehh. ade ke ptt. lol. i told him yg we are ok, we got back tgthr agn. he was like, bagusla kalau mcm tuh and stuff. die psn, if ade mslh, jgn fkirkan sngt sbb me nk spm thun nie. wah, so nice of him. lol. and then, i ckp la yg i am thinking abt ace, bcause ace act dffrnt skrg. xmcm dlu. pastuh bro ckp ah 'mstila, msg2 mst dh brubah skrg, lma bln korg bpsh'. yeah, true true. then die pun ada psn juge, 'when u love sm1, jgn syg smp mrana, cz we dnt knw how it will end up'. true juga. hhaihh. plus ade stu poem ke apa psl cinta yg die ksi. pehh. i bce uh, trasa ah juge. this is the poem :
cinta amat mahal takrifnya, itulah yg difitrah oleh Allah s.w.t kpd hmbanya. cinta hny tertulis pd prktaan, tp gagal dilihat pda zahirnye. krn cinta itu tggjwb dmna wjudnye ksetiaan dan kjujuran didlmnye. ingt pda yg stu, jjur pda yg stia, stia pda yg kasih, ksih pada yg rndu, rndu pda yg mnyayangimu. cnta x akn dtg klo xdcari. cnta juge xkn dpt klo xde sape nk bagi. tp, mncari biarlah pada yg sudi. bukan meraih pda yg simpati.
those words in bold, buat i mcm trase tibetibe. mcm me yg mraih uh dr ace. kan kan? ehmm. i dnt knw. i jst love him so much. ahhh. tension! :((. knp la my life jd mcm nie. kalau la dlu i xmntk break dgn die, mst xjd mcm nie. mst kmi heppi. mnanti detik 17.7 for our 2nd yr annvsry. gosh gosh. wtv pun, i ttp akn lyn bu dgn elok wlpn die lyn me ala kdr or wtsoeva. i nk jge die. i nk syg die. evrythng dia. if die nk mntk break dgn me, me xksh, i akn trma dgn redha. mngkin bkn jdoh kami kan. tp, skrg, me msh ada bubu, me nk buat yg trbaik utk dia. btw bu, i miss you, ilysm.
p/s: mama and abah, i really miss u two. pls come home soon. i dont feel well rght now. my fce jd pct, dh dua hr. my lips mrekah and bdarah. skt. i need both of u by my side. i missed you guys. ehmm. i dnt knw whats wrong wth me. i felt so lemah. i ddnt eat the whole day hr nie, except for a lil bit of bread. then, i dh xmkn lgsg. why eh? ehmm. come back home mama, lets go and see the dctor. i am scared. i rlly am.
24nd may.
u knw what? on this date, at abt eleven smthng, i am his girl again. i am so friggin happy. hehe. well, dua tga hr sblm tuh, i often msg him. than one day bfore this date, i told him evrythng. terus terang la lebih kurang. about every sngle thing. and i told him that i want him back. die suruh i ngorat die balik. so yeah, on this date, i ngorat la die balik. i called him, we talked, dia ttp dgn die punye jokes. hehe. xde pun nk serious taw. lol. he asked me to sing if i xnk ngorat die. baru die trime me. hehe. so, aftr a few while, i did sang a song. nk tahu lagu apa? lagu skolah. miahahhaa. ;p. tehn phne trputus sbb die pnye bttry phne low. so, yeah, i ingt it wont happen that night. but sddnly, he sent me a msg using payit pnye phne, saying that die dh lma trime me, tp sje nk dgr me nyanyi. hehe. mamat tuh. mmg nk kna cubit bnyk bnyk nnt. ngahaha. ;p. its a great day lah juge. :). i am so friggin happy. as for him, i xthu la. ehmm. :(.
25th May.
on this date pula, i fnished my mdyr exm pper. yay! est, boleh tahan la soalan die. hehe. kewlness. i lliikkee. miahaha. ;p. well, abt him, he told me earlier yg die nk pg cmp on this date aftr frday pryer. so, i mati mati la pcye kan. but u knw what? at last, mlm tuh, i sje je on ym, nk apprve syafira pnye rquest as my frnd, tibetibe nmpk die tngah online. i was like so broken hearted time uh. i asked him, 'ckp pg kem ptg td, nie boleh je online', u knw what he replied? 'xjd lor, pegi esk, pkul 6'. than i ws like, 'ok', die just reply 'huhu' je. ehmm. die mcm xheppi je dgn me ok. and die buat i rse mcm i yg pkse die accpt me balik. idk. if i knew yg dia xkn hppy, i wont asked him to accpt me back in his life. siyes, die mmg nmpk cm xheppi je. pura pura heppi. i asked him, die trme me sbb smpati ke, die ckp x, die trme sbb die luv me. ok ok, i trust him. ehm. i asked him, boleh x i cll him bubu, and he was like, ok je. i am a lil bit frustrated rght now. i wnt to knw his real flngs. me tkt, tkt die pula yg tggl me nnt. hmm. what to do nieh. aduhai. he ddnt even call me b ok? he just called me nisa. it seems like, he prefers it that way. i just accpt it wtht saying anythng. yela kan, mst ht die mcm dh twr je. but i am trying hard to mke him cmfrtble again with me. bile dlm phne, die ok taw. tp, kalau ym and msg, die cm lain sikit. i dnt knw why why why why why. runsing la. ehmm. die buat me rse yg die buat ni sume sbb me yg nk, bkn die yg nk. me xnk la mcm tuh. me nk die trme me sbb he loves me and need me. sigh. i am pretty sad. even when i do hve him, i still drop my tears for him evry sngle tme i think abt him. sighh. he means a lot to me. i wnt to mke him happy. i nk jmpe die, so that i cn sit infrnt of him, and stare at his eyes, to know smada die love me or tdk. ehmm. i wnt him to trust me that i wont break his heart agan for the 4th time, i dh hlg die tga kali ok. i dnt wnt to loose him again. he is my everything. i xnk org lain. siyesly i xnk. ehm. within this few months of breakup thingy, it ddnt turned up well. i do miss him. i do love him, infact, makin bnyk. mkn btmbh2. ehm ehm ehm. i wonder what he feels for me. i takut hilang die. die rmai pminat. :((.
as for tday kan, i woke up early, at abt six smthng, msg him gdmrning. then tdo balik. hr nie sngt bosan. xthu la knpe. ehm. pegi tusen je td. dkt rmh td pun, stdy bio je sket. tgk tv. dgr music. main psp. tu je ah. hhaihh. bosan. wondering ape la yg bu buat skrg nie. mst sdg bgmbira. bestnyee. oh lupe pula, smlm bro ayzel msg me, he asked me knpe dlte myspce. and then die tny, mcm mna me dgn ace, or dh dpt ank mami baru. pehh. ade ke ptt. lol. i told him yg we are ok, we got back tgthr agn. he was like, bagusla kalau mcm tuh and stuff. die psn, if ade mslh, jgn fkirkan sngt sbb me nk spm thun nie. wah, so nice of him. lol. and then, i ckp la yg i am thinking abt ace, bcause ace act dffrnt skrg. xmcm dlu. pastuh bro ckp ah 'mstila, msg2 mst dh brubah skrg, lma bln korg bpsh'. yeah, true true. then die pun ada psn juge, 'when u love sm1, jgn syg smp mrana, cz we dnt knw how it will end up'. true juga. hhaihh. plus ade stu poem ke apa psl cinta yg die ksi. pehh. i bce uh, trasa ah juge. this is the poem :
cinta amat mahal takrifnya, itulah yg difitrah oleh Allah s.w.t kpd hmbanya. cinta hny tertulis pd prktaan, tp gagal dilihat pda zahirnye. krn cinta itu tggjwb dmna wjudnye ksetiaan dan kjujuran didlmnye. ingt pda yg stu, jjur pda yg stia, stia pda yg kasih, ksih pada yg rndu, rndu pda yg mnyayangimu. cnta x akn dtg klo xdcari. cnta juge xkn dpt klo xde sape nk bagi. tp, mncari biarlah pada yg sudi. bukan meraih pda yg simpati.
those words in bold, buat i mcm trase tibetibe. mcm me yg mraih uh dr ace. kan kan? ehmm. i dnt knw. i jst love him so much. ahhh. tension! :((. knp la my life jd mcm nie. kalau la dlu i xmntk break dgn die, mst xjd mcm nie. mst kmi heppi. mnanti detik 17.7 for our 2nd yr annvsry. gosh gosh. wtv pun, i ttp akn lyn bu dgn elok wlpn die lyn me ala kdr or wtsoeva. i nk jge die. i nk syg die. evrythng dia. if die nk mntk break dgn me, me xksh, i akn trma dgn redha. mngkin bkn jdoh kami kan. tp, skrg, me msh ada bubu, me nk buat yg trbaik utk dia. btw bu, i miss you, ilysm.
p/s: mama and abah, i really miss u two. pls come home soon. i dont feel well rght now. my fce jd pct, dh dua hr. my lips mrekah and bdarah. skt. i need both of u by my side. i missed you guys. ehmm. i dnt knw whats wrong wth me. i felt so lemah. i ddnt eat the whole day hr nie, except for a lil bit of bread. then, i dh xmkn lgsg. why eh? ehmm. come back home mama, lets go and see the dctor. i am scared. i rlly am.
10th May 2007.
well, dh lma i xtype in this bloggie. sheesh. been busy wth stuff lately smpi lupe nk blogging. miahaha. ;p. well u knw what, hari tue, ace, he gave me this cmmnt at page dealova. ;). on the 5th of may!!
me bru je lps bce msg2 lme kte.. trse rndu plak kt tme dlu.. ale.. tme mde2 dlu.. huhu... funny ade sdh ade grm ade n smue pun ade.. mcm2 ada.. ble trigt ksh lme trse cm nk blk je tme tu.. ble me wit u me rse hppy sgt.. xpnh me rse cmtu.. n me trllu syg sgt kt u.. i rlly2 do.. klo me xsyg kt u me xkn ssh pyh dtg kt kmpg bru dlu yg tme u dtg kl tu smte2 nk jmpe ngn u.. me rindu sgt2 kt u.. n i luv u so mch.. dats y me sggp dtg kt kmpg bru tu.. klo la me xsyg u me xkn dtg pnye aritu.. sbb da tlmpau syg la me dtg tau x.. tp skng kte da jd cmni.. u ngn hdp u me ngn hdp me.. ssh nk jd cm dlu lg.. ht me da twr da.. gne la prnch pape pun die ttp rse twr gak.. umph.. i rlly2 luv u raja ezzatul nisa.. i rlly2 do.. tq so mch fo ur crng n ape2 jela.. me apprcte sgt2.. tq once agn.. tkecre k.. bye
ace, i do love you too. only u je yg xthu. if i ddnt love u, i wont waste my time msging u, clling u, yming u, cmmnting u. my life seems to be so useless wtht u. well yeah, mula mula i think yg i cn live la kan wtht u. tp, frm time to time, it seems to be so hard living wtht u. so so so HARD. i missed u all the time. do u miss me like i missed u? wuallahualam. that cmmnt u gave me, mcm gve me some kind of light and hope. and strting frm that day, i nk u balik. no matter what. even if i get humiliated. :). ily sngt. u je yg xthu.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
